Good Relation with Relatives

“I asked Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) about the words of Allah, Most Glorious is Whose name, ‘. . . have fear of the One by whose name you swear to settle your differences and have respect for your relatives. Allah certainly keeps watch over you.’ (4:1) “The Imam said, ‘It refers to the relatives of people. Allah, the Most Majestic, the Most Holy, has commanded to maintain good relations with relatives and has mentioned it with greatness. Consider that He has placed it next to His own name together with piety.’”

“It is narrated to me from Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) who has said that once a man came to the Holy Prophet and said, ‘O Messenger of Allah, my family has refused to do anything for me but to cut off and abuse me, and I also want to reject them.’ He (the Messenger of Allah) said, ‘If you do so, Allah will reject all of you.’ He then asked, ‘What should I do?’ He (the Messenger of Allah) said, ‘Maintain good relations with whoever cuts you off, give to those who deprive you, and forgive those who do injustice to you. If you do this, you will have support for this from Allah.’”

“Abu al-Hassan al-Rida (a.s.) has said, ‘A man who maintains good relations with his relatives, if he may have only three years to live, Allah, because of his good relations with relatives, will prolong his life up to thirty years; Allah does whatever He wants.’”

“Abu Ja’far (a.s.) has said, ‘Having good relations with relatives cleanses ones deeds, increases ones wealth, repulses misfortunes, makes reckoning easier and delays the coming of death.’”

“The Messenger of Allah has said, ‘I ask my followers who are present, those who are not present, those in the back of men and in the wombs of women to the Day of Judgment to maintain good relations with their relatives even though they are far away at a distance of one year’s journey; it is part of religion.’”

“Maintaining good relations with relatives improves moral behavior, opens the ability for generosity, helps one’s soul agree easily to be generous, increases one’s means of sustenance and delays the coming of death.”

“I heard Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) saying, ‘Kindred relations hold fast to the Throne (of the Lord) and say, “Establish those who establish me and cut off those who cut me off. This is the kindred relation of the family of Muhammad (a.s.) that is mentioned in the words of Allah, the Most Majestic, the Most Holy, . who maintain all the proper relations that Allah has commanded them to maintain. . . ,’ (13:21) and the kindred relation of all relatives.’”

“Abu ‘Abd Allah (a.s.) has said, ‘The first among the parts of human body that will speak on the Day of Judgment will be (that through which) kindred relation (comes into being). It will say, “O Lord, keep good relations with those who kept me properly in the worldly life, and cut off in this life Your good relations with those who cut me off in the worldly life.’”

“Abu ‘Abd Allah (a.s.) has said, ‘Maintain your kindred relations well even if it is a help with a drink of water. The best in such relations are not to cause any suffering to relatives. Keeping good relations with relatives delays the coming of death and brings love among them.”

“Abu Ja’far (a.s.) has said, ‘Kindred relation will hold to the Throne (of the Lord) on the Day of Judgment and say, “O Lord, establish good relations with those who establish me and cut off good relations with those who cut me off.’”

“Abu Dhar (may Allah be pleased with him) has said, ‘I heard the Messenger of Allah saying, “On the Day of Judgment the bridge will stand on two pillars: the kindred relations and safe keeping of trust. Those who maintain good relations with relatives and return the trust will pass the bridge safely to paradise but when the abuser of trust and neglector of good relations with relatives will try to pass the bridge no other deeds will benefit him and he will be thrown off the bridge into the fire.’”

“Abu Ja’far (a.s.) has said, ‘Maintaining good relations with relatives improves moral behavior, strengthens the ability to be generous with the pleasure of one’s soul, increases one’s means of sustenance and delays the coming of death.’”

“Abu Ja’far (a.s.) has said, ‘Maintaining good relations with relatives cleanses the deeds, repulses misfortunes, increases wealth, delays the coming of death, enlarges ones share of sustenance and brings love to the family. Therefore, one must be pious before Allah and maintain good relations with one’s relatives.’”

“I heard Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) say, ‘Maintaining good relations with relatives, and keeping good neighborly relations develop towns and increase lifespans.’”

“The Messenger of Allah has said, ‘The good deed with the quickest reward is maintaining good relations with relatives.’”

“The messenger of Allah has said, ‘One who likes to delay the coming of his death and increase his means of living should maintain good relations with relatives.”

“Abu ‘Abd Allah (a.s.) has said, ‘We do not know of anything that may increase one’s lifespan like maintaining good relations with relatives does. It is so much so that a man’s life span may have only three years been left, but he maintains good relations with relatives, Allah will increase his lifespan to thirty years. The total will be thirty-three years, thus the appointed time for his death will be after thirty-three years. So, then if he severs family ties, so Allah reduces his lifespan by thirty years and sets his term to three years."
Al-Husayn ibn Muhammad has narrated from Mu’alla ibn Muhammad from al- Hassan ibn Ali al-Washsha’ from Abu al-Hassan al-Rida (a.s.) a similar Hadith.

“When Amir al-Mu’minin (Ali ibn abu Talib) (a.s.) left Madina for Basra, on his way he stopped at al-Rabadhah (a place near Jaddah). A man from Muharib (a tribe) came and said, ‘O Amir al-Mu’minin, I have been shouldering many responsibilities for my people and I have asked quite a few of them to help and cooperate with me, instead they have been very harsh to me. O Amir al-Mu’minin, command them to help me and encourage them to cooperate with me.’ The Imam asked, ‘Where are they?’ He said, ‘Those are a few of them as you may see.’ The man has said, ‘The Imam directed his horse to their direction, which began to move faster than trudge. Certain men from his companions followed, but they had difficulty catching up with him, and he would slow down for them until he reached the people and offered them greetings of peace. He asked them about their lack of cooperation with one of their own people. They complained before the Imam and he complained against them. Amir al- Mu’minin (Ali ibn abu Talib) (a.s.) said, ‘A man must maintain good relations with relatives; they are more deserving of benefitting from his virtuous deeds and achievements. The relatives must maintain good relations with one of their own in times of need when things are against him. Those who maintain good relations with relatives and help financially are rewarded. Those who cut off good relations with relatives and turn away commit a sin.’ The man has said, ‘The Imam then turned his horse around and directed it to move.’”

“Amir al-Mu’minin (Ali ibn abu Talib) (a.s.) has said, ‘A man must never turn away from his relatives, even if he is wealthy and has many children. He must not fail to love them, must not ignore their honor, their defense with his hands and tongue. They are the strongest defending power behind him and the most kind to him, who care the most for his affairs if a misfortune may befall him or is suffering from a hardship. One who holds back from his kin’s people only holds back one hand, and they hold back many hands from him. Whoever shows kindness to his friends finds love with them. Whoever extends his hands in charitable ways when he is able to do so Allah replaces for him in this world and will grant manifold of rewards in the next life. The truthful tongue of a man is a thing that Allah makes serve him among the people better than the property that he consumes or leaves as his legacy. No one of you must ever assume boastfulness and arrogance in his soul and distance himself from his relatives, even if he is a wealthy one. No one of you must ever reduce his good relations with his brother or distance from him when he is poor. No one of you must ever neglect relatives. Kindred relation has a characteristic that holding back from it does not benefit one and spending for it does not harm a person.’”

“Once I said to Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) ‘The family of so and so helps each other and maintains good relations.’ The Imam said, ‘Their wealth will increase and their persons will increase. They will remain as such as long as they will not neglect their good relations, if they neglect then they will lose.’”

“The Messenger of Allah has said, ‘A people who are evil doers and not of the virtuous ones but maintain good relations with relatives, their wealth increases, and they live longer. Can one imagine their benefits had they been virtuous and of good deeds?”’

“Amir al-Mu’minin (Ali ibn abu Talib) (a.s.) has said, ‘One must maintain good relations with relatives. Even offering the greeting of peace should not be held back from them. Allah, the Most Blessed, the Most High, says, “Have fear of the One by whose name you swear to settle your differences and have respect for your relatives. Allah certainly keeps watch over you.’” (4:1)

“Once a conversation took place between Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) and ‘Abd Allah ibn al- Hassan and it had become quite noisy and people had gathered around. They departed from each other that evening. The next morning I was out for a task and I saw Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) at the door of ‘Abd Allah ibn al- Hassan who was saying, ‘O girl, tell abu Muhammad to come out.’ He came out and said, ‘O abu ‘Abd Allah what has made you come out this early?’ He replied, ‘Last night I read a verse of the book of Allah, the Majestic, the Glorious, and it worried me.’ He asked, ‘Which verse is it?’ He said, ‘It is the words of Allah, Most Glorious, Most Majestic is Whose mention, “. . . who maintain all the proper relations that Allah has commanded them to maintain, who have fear of their Lord and the hardships of the Day of Judgment,” (13:21) He said, ‘You have spoken the truth. It seems I have never come across this verse in the book of Allah, the Most Majestic, the Most Holy.’ They both wept and hugged each other.’”

“Once, I said to Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) ‘I have a cousin and with him I maintain the good relations that should be maintained with relatives, but he cuts it off. I establish it again and he cuts it off to the extent that 1 have begun to think of cutting it off also. Will you grant me permission do so?’ The Imam said, ‘When you established the relation and he cut it off Allah, the Most Majestic, the Most Holy, established it for both of you. If both of you cut it off, Allah will also cut you off.’”

“Once Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) said to me, ‘I love to show Allah humbling of my neck for my relatives and that I hasten to do good to my relatives and maintain good relations with them before they become independent of me.’”

“The kindred relation of the family of Muhammad, the A ’immah (people who possess Divine Authority), recipients of divine supreme covenant, holds to the Throne (of the Lord) and says, ‘O Lord establish good relations with those who establish good relations with me and cut off with those who cut off with me. ’ Thereafter it is applicable to the kindred relations of the believers. The Imam then read this verse: ‘Have fear of the One by whose name you swear to settle your differences and have respect for your relatives. . . (4:1)

“Once I asked Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) about the words of Allah, the Most Majestic, the Most Holy, ‘. . . who maintain all the proper relations that Allah has commanded them to maintain, who have fear of their Lord and the hardships of the Day of Judgment.’ (13:21) The Imam said, “It refers to your relatives.’”

“Once I asked Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) about the words of Allah, ‘. . . who maintain all the proper relations that Allah has commanded them to maintain, who have fear of their Lord and the hardships of the Day of Judgment.’ (13:21) The Imam said, ‘It was revealed about the family of Muhammad (a.s.) and can also apply to your relatives.’ Then the Imam said, ‘Do not be of those who say about something that it is about one thing only.’”

“The Messenger of Allah has said, ‘Whoever loves Allah’s giving him a long life and increasing his means of sustenance, he should maintain good relations with relatives; kindred relation, will have a sharp tongue on the Day of Judgment and it will say, “O Lord, establish good relations with those who maintained me properly and cut off those who cut me off. A man could be seen on the ways of good deeds but when the kindred relation that he had cut off would come he will be thrown into the depth of fire.’”

“I asked Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) ‘I have certain relatives who are not in my way (my belief). Do they have any rights on me?’ The Imam said, ‘Yes, it is the right of maintaining good relations with relatives that is not cut off by any means. Had they been in the same way as your way they would have had two rights: The right of relatives and the right because of Islam.’”

“I heard Abu ‘Abdillah (a.s.) say, ‘Maintaining good relations with relatives and virtuous deeds ease off the giving of accounts on the Day of Judgment and safeguard against sins. Maintain good relations with relatives and do virtuous deeds to your brothers, even if it is in the form of offering the greeting of peace or responding to the same.”’

“Abu ‘Abd Allah (a.s.) has said, ‘Maintaining good relations with relatives eases off the giving of accounts on the Day of Judgment, delays the coming of death and safeguards against misfortunes. Giving charity at night extinguishes the wrath of the Lord.’”

“Maintaining good relations with relatives cleanses the deeds, increases wealth, eases off the giving of accounts on the Day of Judgment, repels misfortunes and increases one’s means of sustenance.”